Zette's Storybook

From: Alan Orion, Head of FUTURE
December 15, 1996
Report # 1,336,756
Message Begins:

My salutations to High Inspector Cotlavindadinestic, and my hopes that he reached the Council safely. I was sorry he was called away after only a few short hours on Earth. I had so much more to show him. He had a dinner engagement with the Sangre sisters, whom he had only just met an hour before he left world. They regretted missing a chance to continue their conversation with him.

I hope he speaks well of our work here, though he hardly had time to even inspect the building. My apologies to him over the water dragon incident. I am also forwarding a book on indigenous earth reptiles so that he will see the difference between a creature like the water dragon and our elevator keeper, which is a gecko. The stairs were not a better choice, I fear. He'll know better in the future. (Pun intended, of course. Forgive me. It's a joke here at FUTURE HQ.)

Thank you again for your offer of a full stipend, relocation to whatever world I might want, and an honorary title.

However, again I must say that I cannot in good conscience, leave this world with so much teetering on the edge of disaster, and some of it -- I admit -- my own fault. Having made the decision to stay, I was then forced to look the situation fully in the face, and decide what I should do next.

Seppuku seems the best answer. Ah, another local custom that you would not understand. Let me just say that the Sangres have disappeared again. No matter. They'll turn up. They always do.

And at least it won't be boring, not with the Van hunting them in packs. The Gods help the Van if they catch up to the two.

The Sangres said they wanted a holiday off. Any holiday at this point. I have taken them seriously.

I fear to go to sleep at night. I fear what I will find in the morning, and it won't be a nice surprise from Santa Claus, I can guarantee that much. . . .